Knight's Quest: A bed-time story by Qrow Branwen
by ARStudios2000
Summary: When Qrow dropped for a visit to see his beloved nieces, they want him to tell them a bed-time story. So he tells them the most bizarre story you could ever dream up for a bed-time story.
1. Chapter 1

**A story heavily inspired by overly silly comedy movies. Be prepared, because in the following chapters, a lot of stuff won't make logical sense.**

 _ **Knight's Quest: A bed-time story by Qrow Branwen**_

Ruby had always been Qrow's favorite niece. She reminded him of himself in so many ways. Her never-ending energy, her quickness in speech, her spirit for adventure (unfortunately though, she had a distaste for alcohlic beverages).

Qrow had dropped by for yet another visit on his best bro, Taiyang Xiao Long. The log cabin was there as always, picturesque with the forest as it's background. Qrow could remember doubling his visits after the birth of Ruby.

Really, he could see so much of himself in that little girl. She was his little future Huntress. He was quite certain of that.

As night fell, and Yang and Ruby went to bed, Qrow dropped by to check on them both. Both of them had their night lights on, but neither was asleep. Instead, they were both sitting up in bed, looking rather dull.

"Why, whats the matter, kids?" he asked, curious. What was bumming these two out?  
Ruby's face brightened. Uncle Qrow _always_ made her day better!  
"Uncle Qrow, can you tell us a story?" she asked, sitting up.

Qrow was taken aback. Did she actually ask for a bed-time story?  
"Yeah!" Yang said, "Tell us a story!"  
Qrow rubbed his chin. He looked at the two girls. Both of them were now pulling out puppy dog eyes.

Qrow sighed, "All right, all right, you don't need to strain your eyes like that. You want a story?"  
In a flash, he was beside Ruby's bed.

"I'll give you one."  
Both girls cheered, and Yang ran to Ruby's bed, jumping onto it and shifting close to her sister.

Qrow asked, "So kids! What kind of story would you like to hear from Uncle Qrow?"  
"A cool one!" Ruby cheered.

"One with adventure!" Yang chirruped.

"And action!" Ruby added.

"SO...you want an adventure story?" Qrow remarked, his left eye glinting dangerously.

"You got one."  
 **TO BE CONTINUED!**

 **WARNING! THE NEXT SET OF CHAPTERS WILL CONTAIN TONS OF VIOLATIONS OF COMMON SENSE AND PROPER LOGIC.**

 **I mean, Qrow is telling the story after all...**


	2. Chapter 2

**Here we go!**

Ruby and Yang looked at their uncle. He began to storytell...

"Long time ago, in some random old town in some random old countryside place in some country whose name I forgot, there was some kind of monster. A monster that was known for terrorizing local towns, killing people, the usual stuff.

'So in response to this threat a brave contingent of 12 knights, led by none other than Sir Crow marched on to meet this threat and extinguish it from the world."

Yang raised her hands and said, "Wait, wait, wait...sir _Crow?_ Whos that?"

Qrow said, "What? Can't I put a self-insert OC of mine in the story? Its my story after all..."

Ruby raised her little finger to her lips, hissing 'SSSHHHHHHH!' and looked at her uncle again, saying, "Keep telling the story."

"Thanks, girl. So! Sir Crow and the 12 knights had to track this beast down, but they had to get a local tracker to tell them where to find the cave of the beast. I mean, if you're new to the place, you're gonna need a tour guide after all.

"The beast's cave was littered with human bones, broken weaponry, and an amazingly intact sign with no visible damage to it, saying 'Cave of death.' The knights stationed themself right next to some rocks, standing at least 115 metres from the cave mouth. The knights felt the tension, but Sir Crow (who was a bit drunk at the moment, mind you) said, 'All right, little madam, where is the beast we seek?'

The tracker said, 'You're right in front of the cave, nitwit.'

'If I was to be in front of it, wouldn't it be looming in front of me?'

'I meant that its in visible sight, to your forward direction...'

"And then, CUE A STINGER MUSIC CHORD!"

Ruby and Yang gasped and hugged each other. As Qrow was telling the story, both of them were imagining what was happening with the story's knights.

"The knights heard the stinger music and ducked behind rocks, with the tracker. There was a brief moment of silence...and a cat emerged.

" 'A _cat?'_ Sir Lime asked."

"A CAT?!" Yang yelled in surprise. "That stinger music doesn't know how to cue!"

"Hey, you may get surprised. See, all the knights were confused.

'Um...where is the beast again?' Sir Beowolfheart said.

The tracker said, 'There!' Pointing at the cat.

'What, behind it?' Sir Swordelot said.

'NO!' The tracker hissed with frustration, 'the cat _is_ the beast!'"

There was a moment of silence.

Ruby and Yang went in unison "WHAT?!"

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


	3. Chapter 3

**And the story goes on...**

"'YOU HAG!' Sir Crow angrily yelled at the tracker, 'You actually brought us out here to deal with some stray cat?! We're looking for a monster that is killing people!'

'But the cat **_is_** the monster! Don't be decieved by it's cute looks!'  
"Sir Halbeard said, 'What's she gonna do? Scratch your face?'  
"The tracker was getting annoyed by the knights, and said, 'Look, that cat is a killer! She's got a vicious mean streak up to a mile wide!'

"Sir Swordsalot said, 'GET REAL!'

"'She's got claws sharper than steel! Her teeth are like diamond knives!'

"Sword Beowolfheart said, 'I'd soil my armor if she's as scary as you say!'

'Seriously you morons, look at all the broken weapons, armor, and bones lying around the place!'

"'Whatever you say, ya fashion show reject,' Sir Crow said. The tracker (who was actually fair-skinned, had rich black hair, silver eyes, and rather short, about 5 foot, 2 inches, and could certainly have qualified for an Atlas fashion show) was offended and said, 'I'M WARNING YOU!'

"And then Sir Steelwood pulled out his sword, and marched forward, boasting, 'Silly little furball. I'll just kill it if your so persistant on it being dangerous ma'am.'"  
Ruby shook her head, "That poor, poor cat..."

Qrow had a mischievous smile on his face, which Yang noticed.

"Wait..." she asked, "What happened next?"  
"I bet you mean, poor, poor Sir Steelwood!" Qrow said, totally cheery.

"Huh?" was the confused response of both girls.

"Yep! Because before you know it, ten feet away from the cat, Sir Steelwood found out the hardway the cat was every bit as dangerous as the tracker had described! The cat leaped, clung on to Steelwood's neck, and slashed it off!"

Both girls gasped collectively.

"And as Sir Steelwood's now headless body crashed to the ground, all the other knights (Except the tracker, who had seen this dozens of times) became wimps and hid their heads behind the boulders they were taking cover, with Sir Crow yelling, ' _ **MONTY OUM!'"**_

 _"_ And Sir Beowolfheart pretty much soiled his armor, saying, 'I did it again...'"

Ruby gulped. She did not want to meet a cat like this.

"And miss tracker let them have their stupidity by yelling at them, 'I warned you! I warned you! But did you listen to me?! NOPE! Nobody does! It's always the exact same thing! I always warn them! They always die because nobody is ready to believe that a-"

"Sir Crow yelled, 'OH SHUT UP! We have a plan!'

"Swordsalot, totally confused and panicking, said, 'We do?'

"'Aye! **_CHAAAAAAAARGE!'"  
_**

Yang, who was finding this story getting weirder every second, said, "They charged at it? But wouldn't that be incredibly dumb? I mean, they just saw it saw a knight's head off..."  
"Hey," Qrow retorted, putting a hand up, "Tell that to Sir Crow. Now as I was saying...

"The knights charged, while Sir Crow stayed back. The cat saw the line of approaching men, and then proceeded to attack them.

"And boy, what a sight to watch! You got full grown men, armor-clad, armed with swords and shields, getting their butts handed to them by a regular-sized cat, but this cat was super vicious! Leaping around and between the men, slashing with her claws, gnashing her teeth, and cutting shields and smashing swords! You just had to see the faces of some of the knights!"

Ruby and Yang could barely imagine the absolutely terrified expressions of the knights. Those poor warriors...

"Charge wasn't working. So Sir Swordsalot screamed 'RUN AWAY!'

"I mean, what would you do if your frontal assault wasn't working?

"So the remaing knights (They had been dropped from 12 to 6 now) ran for their armored lives, and came back to Sir Crow's position.

"'Right! We're not taking another assault like that!' Sir Crow announced, 'because it's suicide!'  
"'So why did you announce for _them_ to charge and stay back _yourself?'_ the tracker asked.

"'Because I'm the main character! I'm not supposed to die!' Sir Crow replied, 'What's the point of self-insert OCs like me if they die too early?'"

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


	4. Chapter 4

"So the remaining 6 knights and the tracker had to draw conclusions on what to do next."

"Sir Swordsalot said, 'Maybe we can draw it out?'

Sir Beowolfheart said, 'We can throw our swords!'

Sir Crow said, 'Or we can challenge it to a drinking contest!'

Miss tracker drew her own conclusion: 'You all are the worst excuses for knights I have ever seen.'"

Yang said, "Well, they couldn't kill one cat, so she had a point."

Ruby corrected, " _Killer_ cat." She then let out a small yawn.

"But how were the knights going to deal with it?" Yang asked.

Qrow gave a short chuckle, and said, "Well, its a good thing travelling merchants exist!

"See, a travelling merchant was passing by and heard the conversation. He then came closer to them, and introduced himself.

'I believe I, the Shadow Merchant, have what you all are looking for!' Everybody looked a the 3 foot tall merchant who was covered in a grey cloak, and the shadow of it was so thick over his face, that his face was a shadow, and they couldn't make out his face."

'How do we know we can trust you?' Sir Lime asked.

'Well, I heard about your cat problem. Nasty creature. He keeps kilin' my customers! And the local ice cream guy too...anyhows! Know that I do in fact have the solution to your problems!' And with that, Shadow Merchant pulled out a parchment.

TO the untrained eye, it seemed like a trashy, pigeon-poo stained piece of paper. But it was actually more valuable than that.

'This parchment...leads you to what you want the most!'

'Like Captain Jack Sparrow's compass!' Sir Crow commented.

'That piece of junk always kept getting people lost!' Shadow Merchant replied, 'So this will work better! The tracker went forward, saying, 'Thanks!' But the Shadow Merchant said, 'Hold on, ya need to pay up first!'"

"What a selfish guy!" Yang piped.

"Hey," Qrow said, "He needs to make a living, doesn't he?"

Ruby nodded with sleepy eyes.

"Sir Crow said, 'But none of us have money!' But Sir Lime stepped in and said, 'Actually, I do have something that can be traded!'

And he pulled out a massive sack that was 120 times the size of his pocket...from his pocket. Sir Crow, horrified, hissed, 'NOT OUR BOOZE!'

Sir Lime responded, 'But if we don't, innocent people will die!'

The other knights nodded in agreement. Sir Crow look at all of them, and then said, 'Well...I guess you're right. Duty to the people comes first.' Sir Lime said, 'Thank you!' The moment he turned his back, Sir Crow leaned back and said, 'Who votes that we send Sir Lime to his doom by pushing him to the killer cat when he isn't looking?'"

Yang gasped, "Sir Crow didn't!"

"Oh, but he did! And that's what happens sometimes when you're too righteous. Keep it in mind, kids."

Ruby asked, "And then what happened?" Qrow laughed gently, an said, "Hold it, little miss. It's bedtime for you two, and you're barely awake." Ruby, protesting weakly with half-closed eyelids said, "I'm not barely asleep! I want to listen to the whole story!"  
Qrow gently placed a hand on her head, and said, "Next night, okay?"  
And as Yang went to her bed, and Qrow kissed the foreheads of both his beloved little nieces, he went to the door, looked in one last time, and said, "Good night, my little Huntresses...and I'll tell the rest next night..." before closing the door.

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Next night...**

Qrow came back into the room of the two kids, and Yang quickly jumped onto her sister sbed and took her seat. Ruby was excited to hear the rest of the story.

Qrow, seeing how excited the kids were to hear the rest of his story, wonders if he should ever try writing a novel...and then remembered he was banned from writing and publishing any form of article or story after the _last_ time he tried that. While we won't go into details, let's just say...writing an article while you're drunk can result in some... _very_ offended mobs after you.

He resumed his story from last night...

"So with the map in hand, Sir Crow and the tracker set out to the location on the map, the location that would give them a way to be rid of the cat forever..."

"Wait..." Yang asked, "Why did only they go?"  
"Well, Sir Crow is the best of the knights! He's a self-insert OC with tons of Plot Armor! And the tracker is very good in directions, so that's why!"

"So why didn't he attack the cat first?"  
"Because he knew the cat was too tough! Now let me continue...

So Sir Crow and the tracker set off, with a map, Sir Crow's weapons, water, and a pair of coconut halfs with which they made clip-clop noises to imitate horse movements. The journey went well enough for hte first 30 minutes or so...WHEN THE FIRST OBSTACLE ARRIVED!"

Ruby and Yang edged closer.

"What was it?" Ruby asked, full of suspense.

" _ **A DARK KNIGHT."**_

Cue smol-child gasps.

"Dark Knights...the opposite of Knights. Follwoers of the dark rules of the dark rule book, set out by the dark lord from his dark mountain from the dark land in the dark continent...Dark Knights are no small feat to get past...but this was Sir Crow who was going to face this danger!

He approached the Dark Knight, full of confidence, saying, 'Dark Knight! You are in my way! Step aside, or face my blade!'

The Dark Knight looked at him, and said, 'You want to fight me? Like, really? I mean...you want to cross the bridge behind me, no?'

'YES!'

'Sure? It's a really flimsy log bridge, and it's like...a log's length...and the whole area of the river not blocked by forest is like...the length of 3 taverns...and I'm just chilling next to this bridge, which is like, so small...sure you want to waste your time here?'

'YES!'

The tracker facepalmed.

'Very well then. YOU SHALL DIE!' The Dark Knight pulled out his sword, and the fight commenced!

The brave Sir Crow and the ferocious Dark Knight duelled, all right! With swords swinging, sparks flying, cursing, and a moment's break where they both sat down to drink tea (It was the Dark Knight's mom's secret recipe!) and then resumed fighting.  
It was at some point in the fight, that Sir Crow got lucky...and with a might swipe...CUT THE DARK KNIGHT'S LEFT ARM CLEAN OFF!"  
Yang let out a short gasp.

"Yep, it was horrifying." Qrow admitted.

Yang said, "What? No, it's just...I thought I saw something...like...a dream, but not really a dream..."

Ruby questioned, "What did you see?"

Yang replied, "I thought I saw a red-haired guy cut my right arm off till the elbow..."  
Qrow brushed it off, "Nah. You arm getting cut off? Bah! You're only 8 years old, but you're one tough girl! There's no way you're arm's gonna get cut off. Your Aura would never let you get that kind of injury!"

Ruby got back on the story, "So the Dark Knight lost his left arm..."  
"Yes! Sir Crow said, 'Step aside, for you have defeated!'

The Dark Knight said, 'Pfft! This is just an inconvenience!'

'An _inconvenience?!_ Your **arm just got cut off!'**

'SO what?! I'm right handed! I can still handle a sword! Now fight me!'

The Dark Knight raised his sword...but his right arm got cut in a split second. Now he was _unarmed."_

Qrow gave a cue to the girls. Yang gave a laugh, while Ruby rolled her eyes.

"'You have lost!' Sir Crow said, and turned to the tracker's direction. 'Not bad for what you called 'the worst excuse for a k-' OUCH!'

For the Dark Knight had delivered a kick right into Sir Crow's rear! Sir Crow turned to his adversary, who responded, 'CHICKEN! You turn from me when I'm still fighting?'

Sir Crow retorted, 'Look mate, you got no arms left! You lost!'

'No I didn't! They'll just grow back!'

'Limbs don't grow back! The human body's self-repair and healing system isn't _that_ advanced! Consult your nearby biology teacher!'

The Dark Knight gave a kick to Sir Crow's shin. Sir Crow stumbled back, and this time, he was angry all right! He then cut off the Dark Knight's left leg in one swing.

The Dark Knight boasted, 'Is that the best you can do?!'

Sir Crow simply nodded, 'You make me sad.'

' _A Dark Knight isn't defeated so easily! They will always win in hand-to-hand!'_

'How are you gonna win? By bleeding on me?'

The Dark Knight responded by simply bumping into him (he did have only one leg now...), saying, ' _I'll do you for that!'_

'You're a loony, that's what...'

'COME ON YA CHICKEN!'  
Sir Crow simply cut the last leg. He sheathed his sword, and said, 'Since you won't accept defeat, we'll call it a draw.' Sir Crow then turned to the tracker, 'Come, ma'am! The bridge is secure!'

And as Sir Crow and the tracker crossed the bridge (The tracker looking at the Dark Knight incredulously), Mr Darky simply yelled, 'OH RUNNING AWAY, HUH?! COME BACK HERE! WE AIN'T DONE YET! ONCE MY LIMBS GROW BACK, I'LL KILL YOU UNTIL YOU DIE OF IT!'"

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


	6. Chapter 6

"And then as the journey stretched on, they came across another problem! They ran out of water! (But not the rum, somehow...)

'Already?' the tracker complained, 'How much water do you drink?!'

Sir Crow retorted, 'Hey, try walking around a hot countryside in a tunic and a ton of chain mail armor! I need to stay hydrated!'

A bottle got thrown at him, and Sir Crow gave the bottle a cue, saying, ' **Nestle water! Life is refreshing.'** and threw the bottle away. The tracker blinked in confusion, and said, 'I'll...pretend that never happened... whatever that was...we need a water source to refill our water supply...'

Sir Crow looked about him. There was thick forest vegetation everywhere. Some bushes there, rocks there, a poster of the Midnight Riders...

'HEY I SEE A SODA MACHINE!'"  
Yang and Ruby both jumped in surprise.

Yang blurted, "A _**soda machine?**_ In a forest?!"

"Yeah, because why not?" Qrow asked.

"Sir Crow and the tracker ran up to the machine, where Sir Crow looked it up and down. 'Pepsi, Coca Cola, Mountain Dew, Fanta, Mirinda, all my favorites!' Then he saw the coin slot.

The tracker pulled her pockets inside out, admitting, 'I got not change.'

Sir Crow simply put his hands on his (chain mail) hips, and laughed boastfully.

'Who needs change...when you have a _**SWORD?!'**_ And with this, he pulled out his Knight Sword (TM) and stabbed the coin slot at full force!"

Qrow paused.

Ruby and Yang looked at each other. Ruby asked, "Aaaaand...?"

"And...there was a moment. Sir Crow simply said, 'Any second now.'

When somebody behind them yelled 'STOP!'

The tracker sighed, 'Oh what is it now?' Both turned around... to see an elf, wearing a sheriff badge, and holding a baton in hand."  
Yang squealed, "ELVES?! Oh yeah!"  
Qrow, with a smile, replied, "Yeah, Elves. You seem excited?"

"I love elves!"  
"But don't you remember the story of Megabloklad?" Ruby piped in, "He was supposed to help in guarding Helms Shallow, and instead spent the duration of the battle looking for a box for his dwarf friend!"  
Yang crossed her arms, steaming, "That story was spread by an elf hater!"

"You wanna listen to the story or not?" Qrow inquired, looking at both kids.

"YES!"  
"All right...so the Elf Sheriff said, 'STOP! You have violated the law!'

Sir Crow saw the elf, and asked him, 'Oh yeah? What did I do?'

'Violated a soda machine!'

'Uh huh. So what are you gonna do? Arrest me?'

'If you refuse arrest from me, I'd like to see you try refusing arrest from us!'

'What in the Elven Kingdom's sparkly rubbish are you talking about?!'

Arrows, spears, and a Tank's cannon (Along with some weird, floating dog-skull shaped things) popped out of nowhere and all were aimed straight at Sir Crow's face.

'Oh...that's what you were talking about.'

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


	7. Chapter 7

'How was Sir Crow gonna get himself out of this one?!" Ruby asked, now panicking.

"Don't worry, Rue, Sir Crow could get himself out of any situation!" Qrow replied, "For this was going to be a special fight!

As the Elves surrounded Sir Crow, whose doom seemed imminent, the Elf Sheriff said, 'If you refuse arrest, we will take you by force.'

Crow gave a defiant PFFFFTT.

The tracker pleaded, 'Please, Elves! This man and I are on a quest to save villages from a terrible beast!'

Crow said, 'Yeah! A cat! Can you believe it?!'

'If we don't get to our destination quickly, innocent lives will be lost!'

'You can't reason with them, miss tracker! All they care about is their beautiful, flowing long hair, their shiny teeth, their bows and ar- * _ **CLANG***_ hey! That hurt!'

The sheriff looked at Sir Crow, and then at the tracker. He seemed doubtful.

"Well...then the only way you two can leave...s if you defeat one of our archers...in an _**archery contest!"**_

Ruby and Yang gasped.

"But Elves are the best archers in the world of fantasy!" Ruby sputtered, genuinely worried about what was going to happen to Sir Crow.

Qrow laughed and said, "But see, Sir Crow was intelligent!"

"The challenge had been set. And Sir Crow was ready. So was his opponent.

'Ready?' The tracker asked Sir Crow, who simply responded with a nod.

She gave a gulp.

The Elf Sheriff summoned a fair young Elf in front of a tree, and placed an apple on her head. Silence prevailed. He turned back to the archers.

'Archers! You know what to do!' he said imperiously, 'Elf archer goes first!'

Elf archer fired an arrow. It scored a bullseye on the apple. The archer said, 'I am...Treeshoe Longbow!' The eleves bowed their heads.

'Sir Crow!' the Elf Sheriff announced, marking his turn.

Sir Crow took his stance. He drew his arrow and readied his bow. He pulled back on it.

The tracker started praying quickly.

The elves were patient and silent.

Sir Crow fired his arrow.

It pierced Fair Elf Maiden straight in the gut.

All the elves opened their mouths in horror. There was a moment of silence, and then the Elven Archers turned, bows ready, ready to stick Sir Crow with tons of arrows, only to see he and the Tracker were gone.

There was a note instead lying on the ground. The Elf Sheriff picked it up, and read aloud,

' ** _I am... very sorry. Sir Crow.'_**

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


	8. Chapter 8

"That poor Elf maiden..." Ruby said, shaking her head. Qrow comforted her, "Now, now...no need to worry! There are more Elf maidens out there. Now where was I?

"So Sir Crow and the Tracker quickly took cover behind some bushes, and breathed sighes of relief. Looking over his head to see they weren't being followed, Sir Crow said, 'OK, we're good...and I grabbed a few sodas too.'

'You know, we're still wanted.'

'I'm aware, but at least we have something to drink now!'

He pulled out several cans of soda.

'Good thing I sneaked these out when running away!'

The tracker was annoyed, but didn't complain. She took her soda, a 7Up, and drank it. The place was quiet, but she had a bad feeling...

'Maybe we should get going...' we said, but Sir Crow said, 'We can't! Besides, it's night time!'

The light of day suddenly flipped to the dark of night, like as if somebody just turned the lights off.

The Tracker was stumped...but decided to just roll with it. She looked up a tree, and started climbing it. At a branch of reasonable height, she stopped, and looked down. It was a good height up, enough that wild animals wouldn't get to her.

Sir Crow looked around, wondering where he could find a good spot to sleep. Strolling about, looking and poking at plants and bushes and trees and graffiti on some rocks, he eventually stumbled upon a cave.

Pulling his sword out, he carefully made his way in.

The Tracker saw him disappear, and mumbled to herself, 'He's gonna be in a lot of trouble...' She then dozed off, snoring.

 **The next morning!**

The Tracker yawned, refreshed. Her back ached a bit, after all, she _WAS_ sleeping on a tree branch. Looking around, she remarked, 'Beautiful morning...but no sign of Sir Crow...'

Then out of nowhere, Sir Crow popped in, full wearing a bling with 'CRUSADER LIFE' written on it, expensive belt chain, thug life glasses you see in MLG compilations, and last but not the least...a latest series motorcycle!"  
Yang said, 'He was so lucky...one day, _I'll_ get a motorcycle!"

"One day you will, kiddo," Qrow reassured, ruffling her hair, "One day..."

"The story?" Ruby demanded, "How did Sir Crow _get_ all that stuff?"

"Well...what happened was that there had been a casino in that cave! So he won a lot of games and came out with all that stuff!"

"That's crazy!" Yang pouted.  
"It's my story," Qrow justified.

"The Tracker was pretty confused, all right. While she had been sleeping away in a rough tree, HE had been having the time of his life. And he even got himself better transport!  
'So now...we can get to our destination faster without too much hassle!' Sir Crow beamed. The tracker was simply at a loss for words, and before she could say anything else, Sir Crow lifted her off the ground and placed her on the backseat, giving her a helmet for safety.

"HERE WE GO!"  
He revved the motorcycle to full throttle.  
Both Crow and the Tracker fell off the motorcycle as it dashed forward and smashed into a tree. The tree fell over onto it. Then another tree fell onto it. The whole pile then exploded.  
The Tracker was speechless.  
Sir Crow was quiet. Then he shrugged, "Well, looks like we're goin' on foot."

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**

 **My apologies for not updating so long. College has been a real drag and it sucks and I've had to work on lotsa art projects (fanfictions ain't the only thing I do...I've got tumblr and deviatnART and a Youtube too.) Thank you for your patience.**


	9. Chapter 9

**"** Thus Sir Crow and the Tracker went walking!  
And walking.

And walking.

And walking.

ANd walking.

And walking.

Hey look a fly!

When they both stopped. Because there was something in the path!"

Yang and Ruby tensed up. Ruby asked, "What was it?"

"'Well whaddya know?' Sir Crow remarked, picking the penny up, 'Must be my lucky day!'"  
"A _penny?"_ Yang asked, incredulous.

"Hey, you'd want to pick it up too if you were there.

Brushing the penny of all dirt, he proceeded forward. The Tracker shook her head in disappointment.

The path ahead lay uncertain as yet again, the Tracker could feel something close...something coming...The bushes rustled. Sir Crow pulled out his sword. The Tracker quickly took position behind him. The bushes rustled some more. And more. In fact, it was rustling continuously with no pause.

Sir Crow raised his sword, ready to strike. The bush went on rustling.  
And rustling...and rustling...

The Tracker was ready to jump.

Sir Crow took a step towards the rustling bush. He crept closer towards the plant, anticipating an attack from whatever was hiding in it. He put out one hand...and then pulled down the bush's branches.

Inside the bush was a water motor engine. It was running on solar energy. It's vibrations were causing the bush it was hidden in to rustle.

'Huh.' Sir Crow muttered, 'Who'd leave THAT there?' He turned to look at the Tracker, but she was looking at something else. Something behind them. Sir Crow gulped, and turned around. Behind them was an approaching army of Bunny warriors, from knights to magicians, at least 150 strong! They were waving swords, wands, dashing through the trees, and the one in the front yelled, ' _STAY AWAY FROM OUR WATER MOTOR, YA VARMIN!'_

Knowing he couldn't fight that many Bunny warriors, Sir Crow turned, grabbed the Tracker, and ran as fast as he could. 'Run faster, woman!' he yelled, not realizing the Tracker had slipped out of his grasp, 'You're slowing me down!' She ran right past him, saying, ' _I'm_ the one who's ahead, slowpoke!' Sir Crow gasped, but decided to pay attention to his path, though he was a few seconds too late as a bird pooped right on his helmet."

Ruby and Yang burst into giggles, with Yang saying, "Man, if Sir Crow was too scared to fight those Bunny warriors, then they must've been pretty strong!"  
Qrow leaned in to explain, "Hey, you should never underestimate the little guys.

"After quite a while of running, they both stopped to catch their breaths. Sir Crow sat down on a rock, and wiped some twigs off of his helmet. 'Phew!' he breathed, 'That was a close one! Could've sworn they were right behind me, but it's a good thing we got away from them unscathed.' The Tracker looked at him.

Somehow, he hadn't noticed the _arrow_ stuck in the back of his helmet. But hey, he was alive and not complaining, so best to leave it there.

 **TO BE CONTINUED!**


End file.
